Ostatnia aktualizacja: 2020-09-21. Autor: Milena
The north wind called me again. It wouldn’t let me stay in one place
I have already settled in Angra. I have friends there, I have my places. I know every street, I know what to do and where. I’ve already learned to live there.
And then the north wind came. And it sent me in a different direction.
One day I just felt that I had to go somewhere. That I had to leave Angra. So I packed my backpack and went to Biscoitos. And then I went there again. And again. And again.
A friend from Biscoitos was laughing every time that she saw me. She would ask: „So, Milena, have you already found a house for yourself in Biscoitos?”
After three or five such questions, I thought, „Well, why not?” And I started looking around casually. A few days later I found a house! Another few days later – I was already living in it!
And I was terrified
On the one hand – I enjoyed my new house a lot. It is beautiful and functional and well situated. And I feel good in it. From the windows I can see a fragment of the ocean. It’s not the most breathtaking ocean view, but it gives me inner peace. Such confirmation that the ocean is there, that it hasn’t disappeared yet.
On the other hand, I was terrified. I left what I knew and liked for the sake of big unknown. On the spur of the moment, impulse, unclear signs from my intuition. I learned to trust my intuition. But that didn’t change the fact that I was walking the streets of Biscoitos and thinking, „What am I doing here? Why the hell did I do it? What was I thinking??”
This state lasted for about a week
I was aware it was probably temporary, but I was shaking with nervousness anyway. In moments of crisis, I was going straight to the campsite. That place and those people – it was my comfort zone, my oasis of safety. My pulse was slowing down, and I could breathe deeper again. And the next day – the same story.
Give time some time
You might say the island is small and 18 km from Angra to Biscoitos is nothing. And yes, in the case of a large city, it is actually nothing. In the case of the island, it is a huge difference.
During the first week of living in Biscoitos, I was in Angra almost every day. The move involved a lot of paperwork. Daily visits to Angra and daily returns to Biscoitos allowed me to calm down. I needed time to get used to the new situation.
The north wind sent me north
Now, after more than two weeks, I accepted my decision. With all its good sides (which I am happy about) and all its limitations (and believe me, there are many). I don’t know what will happen. But I am open to what life has prepared for me.
My intuition knows what it’s doing. And although I’m not consciously aware of what it means – I trust it. I trust myself.
And I trust the north wind. Who knows what else it has prepared for me.
PS If you liked this article, you may be also interested in the article „Be careful what you wish for!” Have a good day 🙂